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| immabubblybubble 2008-07-07 ch 1, | abuseWow. This is an unuasual take on this subject, I really like it, it is very deep :D I think that it could be longer, but then again, some of the best things in life are short. |
| doctor's diagnosis 2008-07-07 ch 1, | abuseI like this because at first I didn't know what to think. Honestly, with the first few lines I thought it was about annorexia. I don't like how you didn't use punctuation orther than that one comma. Punctuation adds important definition to the structure of a poem, and I think it would greatly improve this piece. I think the ending, mainly the last line, could use a little work. It's so blunt and unimaginitive compared with the rest of the poem. Cheers from the Review Game, r. |
| Billie.Joelle 2008-03-03 ch 1, | abuseReview Game! This was a very nicely written poem.The only problem I had was teh lack of punctuation. It broke up the flow a little bit and made it more difficult to read. I liked your take on stick figures, though, and the whole idea of the poem. Very nice. ~BJ |
| Seize the Day 2008-03-03 ch 1, | abuseOh my god, this is so true for so many people (including me). It's not for others that people want to be anorexic/bulimic or just want to lose a lot of weight. It's mainly for them and their high expectations for themselves. I love it. |
| simpleplan13 2008-02-29 ch 1, | abuseI like the idea of it.. it's really unique and a nice way to point out what's important in life.. however the repetition of stick figure got a little overwhelming.. I think it might be better just to have it in the first and last stanza.. get rid of the third line... start the six line with because it's... (which also make it shorter since I think it's a bit long).. just a thought Still the piece is really cute and I love the last two lines.. if only we were all just happy to be simply what we are... |
| Twilight Starr 2007-12-01 ch 1, | abuseGood poem. ~Twilight Starr~ |
| Kenna-Kat11 2007-11-08 ch 1, | abusei love it...a stick figure means so much more now! :) ~E~ |
| andthevineswillfollow 2007-11-07 ch 1, | abuseInteresting. My favorite line:"It’s just there With a plastered smile on its face" |
| Limegreen elephant 2007-11-07 ch 1, | abuseaw its kute.=) |
| tree of life and shadow 2007-11-07 ch 1, | abusei will never look at stick figures in the sam eway again. awesome. |
| Alpha de la Omega 2007-11-07 ch 1, | abuseI like this. No pretentions. Just purity through simplicity. Bravo! :) |