You obviously don't want to get hurt. You must have been hurt once before. You want guarantees and assurances, but you know there really aren't any. And anyone that tells you so, is just selling you a load of hogwash to get what they want. You are the only thing in life you can be secure in. Each person really is alone...to a degree. We don't have the ability to read minds, so we have to talk to each other, or our inner child, like in this piece. You're especially torn because it seems that you have taken a more difficult path in life in regards to your sexual orientation, and, being able to find the lover(s) that you need to be happy. Add in the difficulty, socially, and with your family, and you can easily feel really alone, because there aren't too many people like you wandering around with a sign saying "Here I am! Here's what I'm about. I'm available. Date me, but don't hurt me!"
So what are you looking for, specifically? And how flexible are you with your needs/wants/ ideal mate(s)? You just need attention, like every other living, breathing, being.

Wow. That was really cool. I really liked it. Excellent job.

this is forestwater.
that was god!

Zah! This was amazing. A very nice introspective piece. So many of us go through similar things...thank you for sharing.

hey there I like it. I really need to make my own acct. and start writing my own stuff on here.

U need to get AIM working sometime wmwhahah.

laterz,

-GrimMalice

Hm, very nice.

You should consider smuggling in information about a character, less openly. Maybe, making all those beautiful descriptions into one paragraph. Also, making the description in first so it would coincide with the rest of the story. (I believe you had done that.. it is proper to stick to the "person" you begin with but I'm assuming first is the only way this story will make sense)

Anyways, I'll have you on my "to read" list. I'll keep up best I can. Keep writing.