The story was interesting.

nice! kinda like a short story. i love how you've split it up, unfurled the story! subtle and sweet. wonderful imagary.. however, call me ignorant or naive if you may, but does it really hurt that much to like someone? i'd imagine that sort of pain more when the person you like likes someone else? *shrugs* i thought the pain was a bit over exaggerated. but apart from that, a great short romance with a dash of hope for the future budding love at the end. i like that.

You have a poetic quality to your writing, which makes for a very interesting read. You do a great job describing the tension your main character is feeling. My only criticism is that sometimes there seems to be a bit too many commas. Other than that, keep up the good work. -- Chuppie