Reviews for Relationships, Pie, and Other Complicated Stuff

Reviews For: Relationships, Pie, and Other Complicated Stuff - Reviews: Page 1 of 39

philosophyonacid 2008-05-14 ch 1, anon.	abuseyou should know that i do in fact own jude law, but that I'm not the least bit upset you used him for your story ;)
Chicken Paddy 2008-05-05 ch 3,	abuseHow can she possibly think that freshly baked apple pie smells bad?? It's one of my favorite desserts! Oh, well. To each their own. Loved the chapter. Heh, I can't help wondering what's going to happen when Marc and Scott both try to get to Allyson. Oh, and when I wake up, I still remember my consonents, but I lose all sense of motor function. Hehe, great chapter GrannyP. Keep up the good work! ~Chicken Paddy
Chicken Paddy 2008-05-04 ch 2,	abuseHa, ha. Very good. I like it. Heh, it's always interesting when the plot lines cross like that. This looks like it will be a very interesting story. Keep up the good work! ~Chicken Paddy
Chicken Paddy 2008-05-03 ch 1,	abuseHeh, I like it. Very good. Congratulations on the "Hook, Line, and Sinker" award, by the way. I think this chapter really sets up the setting and characters well. It really lets you know what's going on. Keep up the good work! ~Chicken Paddy
Jack Argyle 2008-05-03 ch 14,	abuseMore? You want MOAR? Well, Oliver, here you are, and in the same format to stop confusion. Review starts now. Chapter 10: ‘Did the word “shall” really just come out of his mouth? Honestly, I have never heard anyone actually use that word in real life.’ - …I use this word all the time, and so do most of my friends. Perhaps it’s a Continental thing? Summary: Layne’s a bit insane. Just a bit. And she better stay away from Wes, I swear to God. I won’t have anyone touching him. I expect that, in the penultimate chapter, Wes will actually reveal himself to be the second coming of Christ and will promptly take off into the air like Superman and peace will rein throughout the planets. This is the dawning of the Age of Aquarius. However, as much as I like my idea, I do see him slipping gradually into the female gaze. Meh, at least they’ll have awesome babies, you know, like those mutant babies in Indonesia that fight crime. Oh, and referring to your Author’s note, Archie Bunker for the F-ing win. Carroll O’Connor’s the funniest son of a bitch to arise in the 80’s (which I guess isn’t that significant as he was only really up against John Candy. Ergh….John Candy…oops, he’s dead so I better not rip him off) and is the perfect inspiration for Wes’ dad from this point onwards. Chapter 11: ‘So anyway, Layne was like a freaking ice pick loaded with those batteries that never stop working’ “You parked all the way in the South lot? Are you insane?” “Pretty much.” Layne nodded. – ha, knew it. Mark me down for five. “Mustang,” I muttered. “More like, rust-ang.” – Snap, bitch. ‘She was like a female version of me. Only perkier. She was, for lack of a better term, perfect.’ Summary: Another Wes chapter so soon? You sure do understand the common reader’s wants and needs i.e. my wants and needs. And yes, this is the best chapter so far, in terms of hilarity and reader interest. Old Wes is dead. Long live old Wes. Chapter 12: ‘I did one of those ungraceful, pseudo-ninja moves – where you try to get from one place to another but just end up flailing ridiculously and knocking over a bunch of stuff.’ I was stunned. “Is this the apocalypse?” Summary: Man, PJ Wes sounds like a nice guy. I hope he doesn’t resurface. Wes seems to be taking centre-stage here. Even when the chapter is titled ‘Marc’, the only thing Marc has to talk about is his older brother. Though, you did highlight that in your Author’s Note, rendering this comment insignificant. Awesome……now what’s something original I could say….um, I liked your use of apostrophes(?) Chapter 13: “We’re adults, mother. We can go out on school nights if we want.” – I totally imagined him saying this with a British accent. “I did make out with a guy tonight, but it wasn’t your brother.” – Fantastic Summary: Everything’s starting to fire up. And surprisingly there are about 20 more chapters left. This indicates to me that more problems are going to arise before solutions are found for all the current predicaments. When are you going to bring Wes’ old lady-friend back into the mix? Chapter 14: ‘I met Scott’s older brother at the football game, and his name was Wes. Small world. Wouldn’t it be funny if they were the same person?’ – Yes, how funny would that be? I hope it turns out that they actually ARE brothers! How great would that be!?! Oh, wait… “No, nothing,” he answered. “I just missed hearing the sound of your voice.” – I guess this is why I’m such a failure with the ladies. I don’t think I could ever say that without laughing afterwards. Young Scott is a strong lad. “There’s a nerd convention there this weekend, and we wanted to hang around outside and make fun of people.” Summary: Jude Law? Please. Give me Alan Rickman any day. He would slap Jude around like an innocuous Mediterranean boy. Anyways, moving on to the story before this gets anymore bi-curious…I’ve decided to take a gamble, as gambling makes everything more interesting. As we can see, people are pairing off like kindergarteners at a funfair. What about Marc though? I reckon he’ll receive some attention sooner or later…..from Wes’ football player-loving ex perhaps? We shall see. SHALL. Looking at these reviews I think it's easy to say that I'm reading your story and writing stuff about each chapter. If that's too obvious a conclusion for your liking then I'll also add that I'm enjoying it like a fresh scone. Well written.
Jack Argyle 2008-05-03 ch 9,	abuseI've been caught up in some stuff but I've also been sure to read at least one of your fine chapters. And one about Wes, thankfully. Hopefully my next review will be longer and cover more ground. Well-constructed lines: 'Eventually I resorted to entering the public bathrooms and counting fixtures. That was just sad beyond all reason' – crazy 'Hey look, she had eyeballs again today also. That’s good. I hated the idea of her driving up here without being able to see anything.' 'I laughed at her comment. “Sounds like my brother,” I said.' Summary: It seems Marc might just get left in the cold, though I do hope Wes is the one alone with no one in the end. It benefits him. Stay strong, Wes. Let everyone fall into their own romantic places but you must stay strong and hateful and keep on doing what you’re doing.
Jack Argyle 2008-04-26 ch 8,	abuseSince I have an Everest-esque reading climb ahead of me here, let me propose to you a system. Instead of saying how fantastic each chapter is I'll instead point out some lines which resonated nicely with me and which I thought helped the chapters reach their levels of awesomeness. In closing I'll give a brief summary of my thoughts. Wow, this sounds formal. I mean, you don't really need me telling you this is a good and highly engaging story, instead refer to one of you five-hundred and sixty-odd reviews if you want further closure on how great it is. Five-hundred and sity-odd reviews. That's freakin' huge. You've definitly created some magic here. Okay, I'll say it anyway. This is a great story. So, thus begins part one of my reviews. Chapter 3: "delicious pies” – which is nothing more than an oxymoron, if you ask me. paper box shaped like a piece of pie – the to-go box for a slice of pie. Summary – Yep, Layne sure hates pie. A lot. How is it humanly possible for a person to despise pie that much? Honestly, the way she’s carrying on it wouldn’t surprise me if, by chapter 7, she’s the head of a fascist regime, hell-bent on the elimination of the Pie race. Chapter 4: Marc would have no idea what was really going on in my mind. Damn my manliness. Wes didn’t really discriminate against other races or ethnicities; he pretty much hated everyone - good to see he has a strong sense of equality. My mouth was watering already. The pie looked pretty good also. Summary – Do I see complications arousing? I think I do. Pretty sure I do. And Scott is very concerned about his manhood it seems. Does he count his chest hairs at night? Anyway, the next chapter is labeled ‘Wes’, which can only mean more hilarity ensues. Chapter 5: stupid, lazy professor wasting our class time with petty things like socialization - nice Perhaps hitting her in the eye had cured her of her eyeless problem - that makes sense. Summary – Indeed, Wes is awesome. I always prefer to read about hateful people who don’t give a crap. They’re just more amusing. I mean, we all have these thoughts from time to time and when they’re finally personified the average reader can’t help but feel engrossed. And can Layne melt Wes’ icy heart with a cool island song? Or is that cool his hot heart with a fresh island song? Anyway, future complication seem to be popping up as quickly as the economic problems in Zimbabwe. This is definitely building up to a nice climax. Chapter 6: “You’re not even old enough to drink.” “I would be if we lived in some other country,” I shot back – heh, legal drinking age of 18 here. Wait a minute. He had exclamation marks coming out of his mouth too. - I instantly imagined a speech-buble. I know I spelt 'bubble' wrong but someone in my house is listening to Michael Buble so it's rather fitting really. It was so obvious now. And I was surely not pleased. Summary –Things are starting to get messy. Are we going to see some serious undermining and confused antics occur now? I hope so; let’s get these brothers going at each other like rabid hermits. It’s cruel but unmistakably interesting from a reader’s point of view, or POV as they say in the hood. Let us continue then. Chapter 7: Summary- This chapter was just as interesting as the other chapter, if not more so. Although, I must admit no particular quotes made me laugh out loud, I still read it with a smile. I think this chapter was much more about plot development than trying to tickle everyone’s fancies, and even yourself sort of highlighted that in your Author’s Note, so I’m not feeling too guilty. You can’t begin to hate me now if you want. Chapter 8: I could tell throughout the meal that Allyson was really excited about going to the football game – I don’t know why but this disturbs me, but it does. Probably because the women I know who support football vigorously don’t have many teeth left and wear flannelette shirts. They also play bingo a lot. Of course, the two footballs we’re each speaking of are completely different ballgames. I have a feeling that my IQ is dropping just being near these people. Summary – Nice bit of tension here. Marc may have no idea but now Wes certainly does. Here’s hoping that Scott’s dad takes some part in this story soon; awkward moments would surely follow. And a little romantic tone to end the chapter nicely. If my sister’s anything to go by, romance is the third highest thing absorbed by a female, behind air and water. No wonder the critics are raving about this story. Well that ends part one. Chapters nine through late-teens will have to wait for my response a bit longer as I currently have the flu and probably shouldn't even be out of bed. Meh, the opinions of the medical porfession hold no authority over me.
Sierra507 2008-04-25 ch 10,	abusewhat is with layne and fixing ppl up? man, cant she see that Marc is NOT interested in Allyson and Allyson is NOT interested in Marc? lol.
Silveralsa 2008-04-18 ch 32,	abuseYay happy (slightly unresolved) happy endings! :D Lol, great job girlie!
Silveralsa 2008-04-18 ch 31,	abuseYay :)
Silveralsa 2008-04-18 ch 28,	abuseNice to know the mom is going to do something about it, lol...
Silveralsa 2008-04-18 ch 27,	abuseIt's funny thinking of guys snooping like that, always seemed like such a girlt thing, lol...
Silveralsa 2008-04-18 ch 25,	abuseWell played out girl! :D
Silveralsa 2008-04-18 ch 24,	abuseAH hahahahahhaha...
Silveralsa 2008-04-18 ch 22,	abuseSad about the dad, hopefully it'll be hist wake-up call...

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