Reviews for Played my Heartstrings

Reviews For: Played my Heartstrings

Starry-Eyess-X 2008-07-21 ch 1,	abuseWow, this rocked! It was great and sad and very meaningful. Great job! = D X
Sarah Allie 2008-02-22 ch 1,	abuseOh my god, this is phenomenal! At first, I thought the guy did something to break the girl's heart, but it turned out he died :( Awesome poem, though. Great job! Sarah :) x
Lurid Black 2008-01-11 ch 1,	abuseWow, really well written, rhymed perfectly, discriptive and awesome word choice, great poem, keep writing, and i'll keep reading! ~Lurid~
Britte Starr 2007-12-28 ch 1,	abuseThis is much better than Betrayel of Friends. Not that BOF was bad, but this is much better. Great and sad rolled into one. I feel a tear threatening to fall. Very good. -EM
Forever Forbidden 2007-12-12 ch 1,	abuseHey. First off, let me thank you for taking time to read some of my pieces. Second of all, I'm sorry it's taken me so long to reply. Third of all, great job. I'm loving the parallelism and repetition with the poem. The before and after contrast, and "the next thing I knew" to "but I can still feel" gives this such a nice tone. However... (haha, always a catch, hm?) I think you may have wanted this intentionally, but in stanza 2's last line, it reads "playing at my heart". I think it will be better if you changed it to read like the very last line of the poem not only because it will tie the conclusion better, but because it will make more sense and sound cleaner. Eh, but that's just me though. =/ May your pens stay busy! -FF
Fan Fan 2007-12-11 ch 1,	abuseWow, touchingly beautiful. "To give you my tomorrow" is just the perfect phrase there...lovely work :)
Midnight In Eden 2007-12-10 ch 1,	abuseIt wasn't horrendous but it wasn't anything terribly original either. First of all, some technical things. Punctuation in particular is sloppy. You've used it haphazardly wherever you see fit when it should be used consistently through the whole piece. I'd recommend stanzas too, just to break up some of this and give your reader a moment to pause. In terms of content, you've basically played on people's emotions by using the "oh isn't it sad, they were in a car accident". Perhaps it's terrible to think it but car accidents are cliches through and through and you've done nothing with this to make it any different. It's a generic poem about a girl who misses her dead boyfriend. There's nothing personal, specific or unique about the story or the imagery. The images of tears, pain and even the extended music metaphor don't really do anything to make this interesting as a poem. To be honest, cliches can be interesting BUT you have to do something different with them. Exploit them, invert them or parody them. This story is cliched but you could have presented it with better language and imagery which is what I recommend you do with other works you might attempt. Good luck with your poetry. Midnight
quixotic-hope 2007-12-09 ch 1,	abuseI think my favorite verse was this one: "The first time I saw you/ I knew you looked sharp/ But so was the knife/ You drove into my heart." The rest of it was amazing, as well. Definitely sad, but it was also rather surprising. The way it started, I was expecting some sort of betrayal, not death. Very nicely done. I liked this poem a lot, particularly because for once it was sad in a way I couldn't relate to. =) Katie
iheartcarebears 2007-12-08 ch 1,	abuseThat was sad but I liked it. It did make me think about this song by three days grace earlier. I didn't cry but if I weren't so gosh darn tiered I probably would have. Anyway see yall around. :)
poisonedpassions. 2007-12-01 ch 1,	abuseVery strong emotion conveyed in this. I can not think of how to describe it. I liked it very much. Keep writing. Keep your head up. **.
Random-Idiocity 2007-11-30 ch 1,	abuseThis was a great poem. The flow is very well done and I especially liked how the metaphors are music. This line ' You never heard the beat of angels wings' was excellent. Good job and Keep it Up!
Charite 2007-11-30 ch 1,	abusethis poem is great. it evokes deep emotions. you are a wonderful poet.
loversdream17 2007-11-30 ch 1,	abuseWOW! Great job. I really loved it. Its sad and wonderful at the same time. I love the topic you picked for you used it well. The flow is smooth through the whole thing which i love and the rhymming is good to very well done A fantastic piece. Mandi~4~life

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