I like the 'chorus' a ton. Only mistake I caught was the "you're" in the fifth from the bottom. Doesn't bother me, just pointing it out were you to submit this for publication ;-) For the only two poems I've read so far, I think you've got the talent for song. Do you sing professionally then?

It was angry, but we all feel like this toward our parent(s) at some point or another. For me, the flashes are brief and usually far in-between. But I can relate. Don't have a good relationship with my paternal figure(s). Thanks for sharing your feelings with me!

You definitely come across as angry, you've got the emotion part down. You might want to work on cleaning up the rhyme scheme and rhythm. Also, focus on giving specifics, then dividing your poem into literal and symbolic voices. I would recommend reading some T.S. Eliot or William Stafford.

Respectfully yours,
Feather La

This is awesome. Its very strong and it says a lot. I wouldn't change a thing about it.

Terrific work expressing yourself. Great job!

~Twilight Starr~

i like it : ) ...thats about all i can say... yeah...
toodles~
kip