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| crazeedaizee411 2008-05-23 ch 3,  | abuseThis story sounds really good so far!! And it's nearly got the same title as mine!! weird... |
| Arina222 2008-01-12 ch 3, | abusehmm... Is that really the best place to end a chapter...? |
| Arina222 2008-01-11 ch 2, | abuseI already said why I like it, but I sort of have this feeling of fraud, like it can't really be happening, I can't really explain it. Update soon! :) |
| Arina222 2008-01-11 ch 1, | abuseSuch a lack of self-preservation! What a constrictor of a mother! I can really relate to these characters, which is impressive (means they're realistic). Improvement:“Can’t you believe Parker and Angie? I mean seriously get a room.” The second sentence may come across better if you add commas on either end of the seriously. “See she’s fine. Anyway, I can’t believe they did it like right in the middle of the café. So gross.” A comma after "See". |
| Colie Rae 2007-12-06 ch 1, | abuseI like your writing style and your plot idea but it seems far too unrealistic. "Like, we're auditioning now?! Wow, you were fantastic, congradulations!" I think you need more progression and you need to be patient with your plot, let it fold itself out. Don't rush it. |
| disgruntled female 2007-12-06 ch 1, anon. | abuseNice. Great idea. Detailed characters. I look forward to reading the next chapter! |
| SilverMouth 2007-12-05 ch 1, | abuseSo I love the idea, but you're missing a few commas... i.e.: "'...Thank you Mrs. Patrick for notifying us.'” Should be, "'...Thank you, Mrs. Patrick, for notifying us.'” Also, I go to an arts school with all kinds of drama stuff and I'm pretty sure auditions don't work like that... generally, the director has to consult with the casting director, the producer and a whole bunch of other people. Also, scripts are generally given before the actual audition because it's impossible to create a character without reading a whole script through. Finally, I'm a big theater person myself and I just took a class on how to bring out emotions and stuff. Directors aren't going to cast you unless the emotion is visible - and real. A lot of people believe acting is about acting, but it's really about believing and submerging oneself into the world of the character. Most good directors can tell the difference. Great idea, I'll keep reading. Silver |
| Twilight Starr 2007-12-05 ch 1, | abuseI can really relate to the invisible part of Sam. Nice start. Good luck with writing, this story, and life. Have an excellent day. ~Twilight Starr~ |