interesting.

i've had similar experiences.

nice job and imagery...i could really taste the emotion.

yours until the wind changes,

gg

I completely adore this. I know you said you're not happy with the ending, but I love it. It ends on the perfect tone, great job!

AH! that is so creepy! but it was really good, and i could totally COMPLETELY picture everything about this: where it is, who the narrator is, the guy, everyone else in the bar- it is in a bar right? that has pool tables, and she is kinda trying to seduce him even though she hates his guts. The scariest part was "hitpinchstabbitepunchbruise me"- like she is waiting for it, and almost wants it, so everything will be like it has always been. oh, and i though you should know: "instead of letting my die so agonizingly slow from within," shouldn't it be "instead of letting me die so agonizingly slow from within?"

Hey, this was great. I love the imagery and atmosphere this creates (very hot, steamy, sexy XD). I don't know what you're talking about with the ending either, I really like it.

Good job,

xoxo Tequila

i really like your poem

is it based aon a true story?

there were some spelling errors but i loved how descriptive you were

you should check my stuff out

peace

laura-