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| Mercyette 2008-05-30 ch 1,  | abuseCongrats on winning the Freebie! I have to say this was a very cute little story. I could imagine reading this to my children out of a fairy tale book one day. ;) It had a cute little ending, maybe even somewhat of a moral, which makes it even more cute for children to read. Great job with that! You have a nice ending here, but I think this story would have been more powerful if the frog had been happy to be himself. Like, instead of him wishing the other frogs different, he could have appreciated himself for what he was. I think that would be more of an appropriate ending, especially if you were gearing this toward a small child. Overall, this piece was very cute and refreshing. It's nice to read something sweet and simple every now and then. :) |
| Asherah Seirei 2008-05-29 ch 1, | abuseAw, how sweet. Reminded me of a children's bedtime story. The whole thing, did actually, and there may have been some sort of message or moral in it too. But I liked it. It was a fast read that left me feeling happy inside. I didn't see any grammar mistakes, but I think I was too caught up in it to notice them if any appeared. =^^= |
| lonely silhouette 2008-04-05 ch 1, | abuseAdd a comma between please and miss fairy. Yes please, miss fairy! I loved the reasoning for why he didn't want to be a chocolate or lollipop frog, but the paragraph about why he didn't want to be a candy cane frog was too brief and not descriptive. But, anyways, I liked your story and it made me smile at the end. Very cute :) |
| Healing.x.Rain 2007-12-21 ch 1, | abuseThis is really good! I think this is great for children! .:Sarah:. |
| The.Wizard.Pen.Dragon 2007-12-20 ch 1, | abuseThat's awesome-ly random! I loved it! It's ironic and just plain ... well, weird. Write on! Pen.Dragon PS: Jesus rocks! |
| Ryan Billard 2007-12-19 ch 1, | abuseYaye! How cute! |
| Sara Jackson 2007-12-18 ch 1, | abuseI think this would make a great children's story! Maybe you could expand on it a little more, maybe give instances of other types of frogs, or have the normal frog talk to the different frogs... |