Hmm, not bad. I like it. It was a short sweet little story. And I loved Johns reaction to Roy and Roxie's affections.

Good work.

*Snow

that is a good one shot story..i like it...that is sure interesting mistletoe..haha...good job..bye..bye...

Full of fluff this one, but I'll forgive you ;D

It's a cute little story, informative if nothing else. I would've liked some descriptions here and there of the room or characters.

You did a good job with the dialogue tags--I'm referring to describing each of the character's expressions and what was going on as each one of them spoke, but the dialogue itself was quite weak, when it could be so much stronger and had the potential to leave more of an impact.

One of the problems I think was the fluidity and the actual dialect--so to speak. For example...if you were to read the paragraph when Roxie is talking about the Ancient Romans --it seems like she is reading off of a book, it doesn't seem like she is telling the story through her own words.

Like here:

'This probably accounts for the current custom of kissing under the mistletoe.'

It seems robotic in a way, doesn't it? If you listen real carefully to modern speech --nobody talks like that. People might /write/ like that ;)

This hinders people from relating to Roxie --she seems like such a fake character because of it, because there's no life to her really.

You did a much better job with Roy, however --though he only had like 2 lines to say xP

~ Audy