:) That was really cool. I liked it a lot. Better than I thought it would be. You've got some serious talent.

Creepy...
I think Im in love...

Well I liked it... I thought that it was really good. Most people cant really grasp the situation or severaty (sry cant spell very well) in vampire storys. And you caught that really well :D

hmm i liked it. it may not have been your best, but youre one of the first writers able to old my attention in quite a long time. I look forward to reading your other stories

Nice story.

I normally hate vampire stories, and as soon as I started reading this I was scared this would be the same. As I read, your writing managed to draw me into the somewhat cliche situation (walking alone late at night) and making it as exciting as the first time I witnessed it. I don't normally get into stories much, but I caught myself thinking "don't turn around, just get out of there!" or "find somewhere open and go inside."

I had a little trouble working out that she'd fallen though, and had to reread the previous paragraphs when I read about the broken glass. By the way, from experience, whiskey covered glass stings when it cuts you, so maybe a you could include some sort of reaction when she hurts herself.

While the description of the character screamed vampire to me and I knew what was coming, the out of body viewing of the situation added a new angle (no pun intended) to the attack.

It's nice to see someone execute these ideas well, keep writing.

Great story. Nice work on description. Fantastic work.

~Twilight Starr~

Aw, the poor girl. I love the words you used to describe the cold night and how she died.

I always feel it's polite to review the stories of those who review you, so here I go:

Overall, I really liked your story. It was creepy. I just have a couple tips.

1. Quote: They stopped, just outside the pool of light from the street-lamp, so only their feet showed. Now I was positive it was a man.

You're only talking about one person, so you shouldn't use "they." Use "my pursuer" or "the stranger," something neither male or female, but also not plural.

2. I thought it would have been a scarier if you had actually written more and used more details, especially from when your main character realizes the vampire is following her(him?) up until the point when he/she is looking down upon his/her body.

Other than those two little tidbits, I thought your story was really excellent and I look forward to reading anything else you might write.

Epoch

Great story, I like how you explained her fascination with the vampire and how she watched her death from somewhere else, you used fantastic words to describe things to. I liked it!

interestingly... morbid. I like this, especially the ending, how she seems to witness her own death from somewhere else- though I'm not understanding the smile she has. I also liked the fascination she had with this nameless vampire. All very good.

-Rachel