Wow. Okay- this story has a lot to comment on, however first things first. this is a great story. i really enjoyed this so far. this isn't the end is it?
secondly; are you using notepad or word pad? because some of the errors in here are typos and they would normally be corrected by microsoft word. in some instances you'd leave out a few I's or He's and what not.
in the first or second chapter i forget which one it is, when Riley said something along the lines of Alex getting angry or something, to Aubrey. then she rolls her eyes, but then she's saying how 'she blushed furiously. But that was the truth. She really did want him to walk her home.'
i wasn't particulary sure if that was a typo or you just got confused or if it was meant to be like that.

but other than those few little hiccups the story's great.

update soon. happy writing

x

Damn.. I wanted her to be with alex lol I always want the other guy
but this is a cool story I like it

wow love this story very cutesy but I think that's what I love about it! the whole plot and whatnot is very entertaining and I can't wait for u to update!

wow it took you forever to upload another chapter, but i'm glad you finally did. i had been waiting for like ever for this chapter. can't wait for the next one. thanks

Haybell

This story is really sweet and keeps me coming back. Love your writing style and the characters you've created are very real and interesting. I'm really looking forward to reading the next chapter so please update soon! o(^_^)o

I love your story. It's so good. I mean i seriously can't wait till you add moe to your story. I have added it to my favorite stories and can't wait for more! Please hurry and add more!

Wow this story is really great! UPDATE SOON!

this is way good
i would love to know what happens next
it's so lovely
and yet so sad
i like your writing
lots

yep this is good
normally i read the whole thing and review later
but i'm running out of time
i promise to come back later
cause it's good

It's an interesting start to what surely will be an interesting story... there are a good deal of typos and missing words, like when they are still at school and Aubrey says, "All you ever do is protect from Riley you need a break."

First, you need the 'me' after protect, and some punctuation after 'Riley' would probably help. Otherwise, it makes sense, but isn't exactly correct...

Hey, just wanted to review your story since i liked it so much! this is actually the first story i've read on fiction press, and i like it!

What's a bit freaky is the likeness of some of the characters to myself or some friends of mine...except my life isn't as exciting as having boys fight over me, or having anyone who likes me haha.

Anyways, just watch your language a bit (although that's probably my own personal preferance) and just watch a few teeny spelling errors and incorrect tense in grammar, other then that, Keep writing!

My.Psuedonym.Was.Taken aka Maddy ☻ ☺ ♥

Garsh, I was kinda hoping that she would end up with alex so lets get Riley out of the picture
*kills Alex*
:D So now its OBVIOUS their gonna get togethere.
I mean, you doesn't want a hot cali guy as their bf?

GREAT!

AWESOME story update soon I can't wait to read more!

Pretty cool Lindsey...keep up the good work! I want to read more XD