This seemed more like a poem than fiction, really interesting style. Perhaps you could expand it into a prose version? It would be interesting to hear a more extended take on these two stories. I found the style a little confusing but I think that is due to the formatting of FictionPress, and sometimes you use too many commas in the same sentence, e.g. "He had to take her away, the poor dead girl, and keep her in his castle, as a tribute to her, the most beautiful woman he'd ever seen." It may have been better with semi-colons? Just a few thoughts, I really like the alternative versions you do fairytales!

Your faerie tale retellings are simply amazing! I would certainly agree with the fact that the tame version is scary, and the recommendation of "Snow, Glass, Apples"-- but those things are irrelevant. So. The story.
I like how your retelling, while not entirely original in terms of plot (you may disagree, if you aren't as obsessed with reading stories like this as I am) is still a fresh, new idea just because of how you've written it. The impartial narrator and storyteller voice are wonderful, and I was drawn in from the first sentence. I've always found it interesting that Snow WHite and the apple are inversions of each other, certainly.
Truly, your stories are too beautiful to ask you to change much. But, in the spirit of a review, I would like to mention that you contradict yourself a few paragraphs in ("there was no mirror" and then "she spoke to the mirror"). If the two paragraphs that hold these statements were opposites, along the lines of there being two stories, it would make sense, but they aren't, so it doesn't.
Again, I'm adding this to my C2; again, I'm from the Review Marathon; and again, the link is in my profile. Thank you for allowing me to read your work!

Review Marathon Event - refer to link in profile.

You managed to add beat and rythm to this. Mainly short sentences set the pace too. There's also some pattern. This is a little like a poem, but with way heavier descriptions. It was cool in the way in which you've combined the two ideas this way - the girl and the apple.

Is dialogue possible in this format? It would have been better if you added more effects like that. Like you have it sort-of-passively with like at once one place with a "he said", but not actively. It also feels a little jumpy, or maybe that's how the fable's meant to be? Feels a little weird too. Although I know there was a great attempt at repetition, perhaps it was a touch overused and could have applied for minor variations, especially like how sentences started and all.

I love it, of course! I think people shy away from darker interpretations or versions of fairy tales, but fairy tales themselves are far from tame. just a personal opinion :)