 Means To An End 2008-01-29 . chapter 1The angle of 'lover crazed into killing his significant other, and espousing on why he was right' has been beaten to death literally over the centuries, but you do it well here. It's nice, giving only fragments of the murder, it's cause, of the murderer, and leaving the reader to piece it all together.
Cheers |
 Parade For Vincent 2008-01-27 . chapter 1This is a very abstract piece it seems, and very well written. I like the morbid elaboration on the significance of The Hall that you went into--in short, the sensations and adjectives you used to describe the scene were mad effective and well executed to bring about the horrific atmosphere. Quite the psychological thriller. :)
The only thing I would ask you to look at again is probably the fact that you described The Hall and moving through it one paragraph, but you went on to narrate the death of his lover in the same paragraph. Basically, you wrote about two topics in one paragraph which I think would've ultimately been more effective if you'd separated them into two separate paragraphs if you know what I mean. Still, however, I was truly entertained and freaked out by this, especially the metaphorical connection you created between The Hall and the kill. At least, that's how I interpret it.
All in all, very good one-shot. 9/10 stars! |