I thought this was really great!

I liked that you broke away from the format of prose because it seemed like a really creative move.

I also liked that you made the slave not love her. So instead of this being a forbidden romance story,this is just a princess who refuses to love the perfect man for her. I'm very attracted to this concept because most writers like to explore it the other way around.

The only thing I think could be improved upon would be the punctuation. I like that you use punctuation in the second half because it gives the story more stability. So I'd like to read it with punctuation in the beginning of the tale as well. Adding it would also make the story more even since part of it's going with and the other part without.

I hope that's helpful :)

--ADS, The Review Marathon (for more info, see the link on my profile)