|
|
| Home Just In Communities Forums Beta Readers Dictionary Search | Login Register Extras |
| Scarlett Wynter 2008-06-09 ch 1, | abusewow, this was...intense and very angsty. I liked how you switched from using the 3rd person "she" in the beginning to using "you" toward the end & how the last stanza was such a slap in the face. hmm...you use the word "asshole" too much though, perhaps you could use another swear/insulting word? you know, just to mix it up a bit. But otherwise, this is a really great poem. ...I never understood girls like that. And I don't think I ever will. hugs, Scarlett |
| crazy dog events 2008-04-02 ch 1, | abuseman, having been one of those girls in the past, I've got to say sorry. But it won't always be that way. I dig this. It's crude and it screams boy and it's true. Kudos to you, man. |
| simpleplan13 2008-01-31 ch 1, | abuseI cant really remember what about this piece is different than the last piece.. but I like this poem a lot too... its still very powerful and makes the same point extremely well |
| paris is burning 2008-01-30 ch 1, | abuseyou are awesome and the things you make are awesome. i`m gonna have to agree with the above commenter and say that was probably the best thing ever. reminds me of, "the artist`s opprobrium". and that`s by the best band ever, so hooray, hooray! |
| Eros. Lost 2008-01-29 ch 1, | abuseOh, my. I love this. especially this part: she’ll roughly suck his porno penis cupping it like a tootsie roll between her teeth as its conservative lips shoot out like a wet roller coaster while she’s entering the pants of a Spartan Beautiful, sadistic, erotic, terrifying images! Fave + |