 simpleplan13 2008-01-31 . chapter 1The piece was really great.. I love the part about the rose intertwining with your soul... and the ending was very powerful and beautifully done a few things though
The death that would haunt me/And plagued my dreams.. would haunt and plague or haunted and plagued
And so I lived my life/In the emptiness that I was... the that I was seems odd... maybe that I was in... but I think in the emptiness would work...
I might also work with the stanzas... because the and luckily part almost seems like it applies to the end, not just the it was my secret line
But all in all the piece was really well written and powerful.. I also really love the title |