=D Awesome! VERY Cool.

Don't you just love music? ;)

aw he ran away from embarrassment
and fear of letting someone in

cute shy boy with such talents=meh turning to mush lol

Aw..I like Hunter. :)

This was such a cute not so one shot one shot! I love musicians too, especially drummers. SOO HOTT!! :P And Hunter sounds amazing. Awesome job!

nice.

I love the title, haha. ;]]

And this one is my.. Second favorite! :D Yeah. I really like this one a lot, but then again, I love all of your one shots/short stories! xDD

Who's **? I'm **. I', close to turning this entire review into capitals but I won't. Know I like short stories but you know what now that i've calmed down I like the way you write this short stories. Romance really goes nowhere and I'd be bored the farther you got, I really liked chapter 3. And like that you didn't make more cha[ters. So off I go to read more. I almost stopped visiting this site because the stories sucked and it seemed like I read all the good ones, how wrong was I.

I adore it.

OK, so here's my overall impression on this lovely short story:

First of all, I adore your characters, but I think all of them could have used more development. Ryan is Natalie's best friend, but he has a very small part compared to Hunter. As for Kenny, Hutch, Brad, and Sean, their roles were hardly even mentionable. Natalie's back-story and family life are a mystery, as is the reason behind why Hunter is the way he is. They all hold the potential to be a really great ensemble cast, but this story is so short as to only give each of them opportunity to show one single facet of their personalities.

You have some truly stunning prose thrown in here. And I don't mean "for a FP writer" or "for this type of story"--it's just plain skillfully-wrought prose. I think you could even do more of that, if you really wanted to; you've got more opportunity than you think to really unfold.

I love Hunter and Natalie's relationship. It's gentle and quiet and, best of all, subtle. Admittedly, I did see a little disjoint in between Hunter resenting her and suddenly liking her a lot. I don't think there has to be any huge change to the story; instead, I felt that perhaps there should be one more chapter, perhaps between the second and the third. It seems that more time should have elapsed to give their relationship more depth.

This is truly a very well-written story. You've added unique, not necessarily expected depths to a more familiar plot. You should be proud of this story; well done.

Me again!

Ah! I love the first paragraph. Descriptions are my favorite things to read--descriptions of places, weather, characters--you name it. Beautiful.

This isn't necessarily a criticism so much as just an observation thus far: Hunter is a little stereotypical. He's dark and scary and plays an instrument, and beyond that, he's defensive and wants to take on the world by himself. The character mold itself is an intriguing one, but I'd love to see it broken.

I love Natalie's sarcasm. It does the heart good to see a main character who has a firm grasp on the ironic. It's excellent that you've given your protagonist some backbone.

Ehh...The "bash your face in" line was a little cliched, a little action movie. It conflicts with the sort of aloof, intense image you've given Hunter. He's such a great character, and he doesn't need to say things like that to give him that dark sort of power.

Excellent use of the cliffie. Well done. I love a well-executed ending like that.

OK, first off, I must say that I love this being centered on a ska band for once! Band fics are fun to read, but it seems like the band in question is ALWAYS an emo rock group. Not that I don't love emo, but...ska! Right on.

I like that Natalie was the one who did want Hunter in the band--ergo he didn't overhear her badmouthing him--although it does sort of lessen the need to overcome that possible complication to the story. That sounded odd: I meant that it simplifies their initial relationship. But this is a short story, so I understand your desire not to make the storyline completely convoluted from the get-go.

The descriptions of the other prospective drummers are classic. Tao the aging hippie is my personal favorite. Although I must say that the line, "He had been playing 'Mary Had a Little Lamb' for about ten minutes," was laugh-out-loud funny.

I will admit that I'm a little confused by all the band members. That was a lot of names to introduce in one chapter without really giving us too many specific characteristics to go on. BUT as I said, I love the fact that it's a ska band, and ska bands have to have horns, obviously. So I'll just look for more about them in the following chapters.

Speaking of which...

Ok, I totally love this story. Hunter... hmm... I think I like him :D

Just one word: Aw! :)

Oh, and you write really well. I loved this.

awesome! >.< I love it when people write stories like this, where it turns out this guy everyone thinks is a huge badass delinquent ISN'T, and he's not some stupid bad-boy either, he's just bad with people.

And I can totally relate with the whole secretly loving chick flicks thing. Not all of 'em, but She's the Man is my favorite movie ever. And my entire family thinks I'm this cynical, cold hearted romance killer. I have a reputation to maintain... it's a good thing they don't read my favorite list, or my cover would be blown. :P