 DONTtouchMYpotato 2008-06-14 . chapter 1naw! how cute! bet your happy aye *wink* LOL! |
 Momiji K. Sohma 2008-05-15 . chapter 1Aw! I loved it, I hope he feels the same way. |
 BrokenHeart4Eva 2008-03-22 . chapter 1i love it! its amazing and the imagry capture my imagination! right on! |
 kloun mannequin 2008-03-14 . chapter 1oh my it's so sweet, I like:
Pulling me closer so I couldn’t get away
As if you were trying to say ‘Never leave me’
I'd love to feel this someday, true love I mean.
it's a nice poem. |
 simpleplan13 2008-02-21 . chapter 1I wouldn't use sweet in both the second and third line.. it seemed a bit repetitive.. also you used look in the sixth and seventh line.. again I might change one to gaze or something
You had a smile on your face as you said.. a bit wordy maybe...
With a breathtaking smile, you said, or something to that effect
I might change he's already caught my eye to he'd already... I think the past tense sounds better...
The second night was just as great but last night I remembered the most.. I didn't like that line it wasn't really that relevant and it seemed too long... the reader doesnt need to know there was a second night if you're not gonna talk about it.. I might say, "every moment together was perfection/ but on the night I remember most"
I love the part about asking and answering the silent question that was really nice... I also love the part "I almost exploded" and the lines about putting your arms around your waist so you can't get away and what they were saying.. that was a great description... I also like the ending a lot too
The piece is really sweet and definitely something I could relate too... really nicely done |
 angel953 2008-02-21 . chapter 1This is so sweet! I love it so much!
Hope all works out between the two of you.
~angel953 |
 Twilight Starr 2008-02-20 . chapter 1Aww, adorable piece. It sounds like things are going great for you. I hope they continue to go that way. Have a fantastic day. :D
~Twilight Starr~ |
 sweets555 2008-02-20 . chapter 1I'm so happy for you kristie!! I'd say i hoped things are going well, but its apparent they are. |
 totallyinspired 2008-02-20 . chapter 1aww so sweet! |
 Yusuf 2008-02-20 . chapter 1Wow. He must be one lucky guy to have found you.
Nicely written.
~Yusuf |