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| Jon Blue 2008-02-21 ch 1, | abusehm. with such a title I expect a little more. __Emotion and he parted ways long ago you mean him right? __and his ashen heart belongs to reason I think I wrote somethin about an ashy heart once before, good metaphor though... I don't know what C.S. Lewis reference you got this from, but I would enjoy reading it. however I'm not sure I see the entire picture. __A dispassionate duplicitous deceiver good use of alliteration, I like that, schooled me too with duplicitous. cheers to that! __And the choking death of silence hmm, not sure if I like the ending, it's good but with the title standing like so, I think you may need to offer something more powerful, this seems cliche, though it's cliche to say so. anyways good luck, keep it up. |