I quite liked the story. Only thing I have to say (which won't make much of a difference, since you sent it in) is that the French at the end is in the wrong form. You've got it in vous (I'm assuming you used a translator? Becauase those always do vous) and since it's the teacher talking to Missy it would be tu. But I'm sure Alpha won't care about your French. :P Great job, Ali!

CC

definately improved over first drafts. I see the first part gives a more complete picture of who the main characters are (not always needed, it could be developed later) it seems appropriate in this story to know at least a little about them at the start. I am sure you will be admitted to writer's camp
I hope you post some information about the activities and some of your stories. The story shows some thoughtful time spent in making improvements. Congratulations.