FictionPress.com - let the words flow
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| simpleplan13 2008-03-18 ch 1,  | abuseI liked this until the end... I loved how you described everything without having to say it was a basketball. Some of the lines seemed a bit off, but other than that it flowed really well. My thing this with the end is I felt like it was implied the prize was a basketball throughout the whole piece... so why does it seem like it's a revelation? I dunno... but other than that I really liked it |