haha what an epic loser. my story has a character along dat lines too

Love the concept, and it does follow Douglas Adam's pattern almost exactly: an apparently insanely meaningless assemblage of hilarious patter with a definite and thought-inspiring moral as a conclusion. If I were to criticize anything (which I won't) it would be that you seemed to never run out of witty inocuousisms (which isn't a word) at any point.