great story. It's really scary.

I'd like to see more detail. There's a lot of dialogue. Show also actions during dialogue, reactions to what's been said.

remember, sometimes a character's silence says a lot more than anything they could say aloud.
Same goes for actions.

Though what I'd most like to see is more detail on the setting. Not just an abrupt halting of narration to describe a setting. But rather have your setting interact with your story, have your characters interact with the setting, as if the setting is a character in itself. It'll change the flow and the progression of your work very significantly, and it'll be very prolific.

Also, when you say "the house" as your first two words. Try to be more specific.

"The victorian house"

"Old man Miller's house."

It'll give the reader a sense of attachment to it, as if they can relate to it. It'll make it overall more authentic, and they'll be able to get a better picture.

~Laeden

Wow. That is some spooky story, well done!

Will Aiden go back to the house later on??