|Reviews for The Eleventh Annual Hide Or Die Summer Challenge|
| Merlingale 4/4/08 . chapter 1
one of the most intense and thrilling things i think ive read.
i love you *worships*
| annixie 4/3/08 . chapter 1
kind of amazing )
i LOVE LOVE LOVE the idea of the whole annual hide or die, it sounds like so much fun. something i'd love to be in. and i love how pumped they all get over it. and i love how you expressed it with words.
one of my favorites :D (i'm so sharing this to my friends)
| red-cowboy-boots 4/3/08 . chapter 1
Wow! That was rather awesome indeed! I absolutely love your writing!
| Jen 4/1/08 . chapter 1
That was unbelievably hysterical. For serious. I think what I liked most about it was the way it was written - the colloquialisms, and everything. It was written very much like it was the inner workings of a college girl's mind.
And of course I seriously love the "Hide or Die Challenge". Brings back fond memories of hiding in shrubbery during games of nighttime hide and seek.
Also, I hat yo. Now I want Stefano's.
| squiggle-line 3/31/08 . chapter 1
I love love love the premise. Hide or Die! Kudos to you for turning a story about UST into something more. Just a few comments:
"Talk to me tomorrow, though? Who knows." These two sentences really tripped me up. Maybe use a period at the end of the first sentence and a question mark at the end of the second...
"My mother says it’s because of the glue..." I understand Adelaide's point but this sentence sounds awkward because earlier, she talks about a bond, not glue. Is there any way to make that transition smoother?
"...since we’re all off in college and getting educated and all of that..." Oh yeah, getting educated...how pesky.
How old are Erin's brothers? Adelaide mentions that Greg and Justin go to school with her so they must all be close in age...but I had a difficult time figuring out if Erin was a middle sister or a younger one.
"I’ve been getting death threats on Facebook for like a week now." :)
Haha, I love her nickname...and "sex goddess mode"!
"Let’s just say some people were pretty creative with their insults." How? There are places in the story where you tend to tell instead of show, especially during this dinner scene...I get the sense that you're trying to move the story forward but are getting bogged down with detail. I think you did a really good job of creating the goofy mood early in the story when Adelaide and Erin are at Starbucks so I don't think you have to concentrate on it as much later on.
I really want to know more about Charlie. The two things that make me want Adelaide and Charlie to get together at the end are (1) Charlie doesn't see Adelaide as a one night stand (2) Adelaide also likes Charlie on more than a physical level. You give us little glimpses into their past but most of that is focused on physical attraction. Their relationship seems to be more developed than one between two people who randomly hook up with each other though. Why does Adelaide like Charlie so much? During the school year, do they talk to each other? You do a good job of establishing the relationship between Adelaide and Erin (and Erin's family)...I think it would help if you made the relationship between Adelaide and Charlie a little clearer.
"...a cute little [hole?] in the wall place..."
| SparklingStar25 3/31/08 . chapter 1
This is fabulous!
| dimethylmercury 3/31/08 . chapter 1
So CUTE!(: I love starbucks too!(:(Random, I know) This fit a one-shot type of fic so well(:
| Cortney 3/30/08 . chapter 1
I LOVED this story! The imagery and writing in general was awesome, the sexual tension and chemistry between Adelaide and Charlie was tangible, and the premise of the game was a great idea. The action was great; even the name of the game was a fantastic touch.
One thought: I kept expecting the Starbucks guy to pop up somewhere in the game since he was kind of a big deal for thirty seconds in the beginning. It just seemed like the way he was written, we'd see more of him. But that could just be my own perception.
| sketchingaCYNiC 3/30/08 . chapter 1
i LOVED this. lol! so funny. A LOT of UST in here :P rock on!
| MZ PEACHESZZ 3/30/08 . chapter 1
AH! okay this has to be the BEST challenge response/short fic i have ever read! The lust! The hotness! Goodness, please write another short continuation with plenty of sex! you totally witheld that from us- like one more chapter!
| Riley Hunter 3/30/08 . chapter 1
OMG. Hilarious skow challenge! (Yahoo...recently joined, so you don't know me. sorry!)
You are an EXCELLENT writer :) And I REALLY love this story ;)
| Cashaholic 3/30/08 . chapter 1
My my, this is an extremely good one shot. A really fun read. haha, definitely worth my vote ;)
| glamoureste 3/30/08 . chapter 1
holy shit, that was so cute!
and it was very unique and amazingly sexily hot.
| Lil Bazza 3/29/08 . chapter 1
That was AMAZING. Man, now I have UST... and I want to go to the Twelfth Annual Hide Or Die Summer Challenge and find my own Charlie. Gah. How could you possibly do that to me? You need a warning on the author note or something because that was seriously delicious.
It was such a good distraction (but severely unneeded) from work. Thank you very much, I mean it. I am still floating from the wonderfulness that was that story. And I haven't read such one shot quality (or story quality really) in a while. I'm off to find some more of your stories, it's that good! And I've read other responses to this challenge and yours so deserves to win. Really. Omg, seriously.
Anyway, thanks for the great story!
| curious.soul 3/29/08 . chapter 1
loved it. the gummy bear thing could've been integrated a little better- seemed a little out of place. but altogether, a fun and easy read