FictionPress.com - let the words flow
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| Poetryfreak173 2008-03-29 ch 1,  | abuseGrr...Capitalization dude. Capitalization. If you were trying to make a statement it didn't work for me. This could be breathtaking, but...the capitalization. |
| diffident 2008-03-29 ch 1, | abuseI like how you put "cut through the light" in its own stanza; it's effective. I really like this poem. Except the last line seems out of place. Everything else seems tied together by loose repetition, but that's so out of place. Maybe you're trying to say something about "your new address". Other than the last line, fantastic poem! marie |
| siphoned afterglow 2008-03-29 ch 1, | abusei like the idea of paper going wooden with age. you write well with your imagery woven deeply. the lines in your poem are like flickering thoughts in your head that you've captured with simplicity and very few people can do that. awesome. |
| ElectricLight 2008-03-29 ch 1, | abuseThis is so excellent! It trembles with emotion. You've created a beautiful poem. |
| arwenfrodogurl 2008-03-29 ch 1, | abuse"in the rain even the statues shed tears." This is brilliance. |
| W. Griffin 2008-03-29 ch 1, | abusethis is really good! -w. griffin |