really nice images...should build on it with some rhyme and meter...the fogged mirror crying and the last metaphor...very nice...good stuff

Michael

it had moments of brilliance that showed through, but i think that some of the metaphors and whatnot can be improved.

Hmm, I liked the feel and some of the imagery you used in this poem. The etch n sketch line was good, and the ending was original. Some of it seems cliche towards the middle, but I guess you can't help it with the subject matter. There was a good taste of apathy here, though I'm not sure if that was the emotion you were going for. Well, good job.