Let There Be Light was amazing. Amazing!

Denial-
To be honest with you, I didn't love this as a poem. I don't mean to hurt you by saying that, but it just seemed like regular sentences broken into lines, which I guess poetry is, but it seemed a little plain. The emotion comes across though.

Let There Be Light-
This poem I did like. A lot. :)
It was a tad list-y for me because the lines aren't directly connected. For example, you just write "Twilight." It looked like a title or header for a section instead of part of the poem. You have some really lovely lines in this poem though. Lovely piece.

The Circle of Life-
Again, same thing about the list-y sort of thing. I liked the rhythm and repetition in this one though, so the listing worked. The last line was very clever and wraps it up nicely. Good work! I enjoyed reading every one of these poems. :)

--REVIEW FOR LET THERE BE LIGHT--
I liked the words that you've used here. It's ethereal, and goes very well with the feel of the poem. I also like the last lines of the poem. They have a kind of...understated pathos that got to me.
Nice work!
Sincerely
Caramir
By the way, be sure to check out the Review Marathon- link in my profile)

I liked what you were saying, but not necessarily how you said it. In Denial, I thought that the line breaks and stanzas could have been more effectively arranged. Also, I would have really enjoyed punctuation within the three poems, especially in the "Trapped In truth In faith In life" section of The Circle of Life.

You're first line with "Denial" was a bit conceited. But don't worry about it, it's part of the literature. I liked you ended it, "for without you i am only half of what i could be," it was just one line but it already conveyed a lot of meaning.

"Let there be light" was like comparing night and day.

good job!

keep it up!

:)

I liked 'Denial' the most. It was very powerful and I could feel the desperation and longing of the speaker... there was a lot of emotion in the words. Great job.

-Apple

i liked the circle of life the best of the three, its wonderful how such short words can actually describe so much and i like the last line. in short i really love the structure and flow of the poems but personally prefer more original use of words, let there be light had the best word choice and imagery.

i liked denial the best i think. it gets the message across really well. i also liked how you described the truth was in the eyes.

also the simplicity of the circle of life was nice.

Especially liked the Circle of Life. Pretty great for first time--you should try more.

Happy writing,
-DV-

well done. i really liked let there be light

Freebie Review!

Denial: this shows deep, raw emotion. not much imagery, but not much is needed for this type of poem, i do like this line though: My soul bleeds when you are apart from me. the last line puts the finishing touch!

Let There Be Light: ehh, honestly, i'm not much for this one. i think it could use a little work with wording and such. i do like the first line of each stanza though

The Circle Of Life: "Trapped, In truth, In faith, In life" wow! love that line!! it's the whole meaning of the poem in just a few words. i like that =] i like the word choice in this piece, even though i personally don't care for the actual piece itself

All three are beautifully written with elegance and unique style. I adore "Denial" the most, for it's simplicity and deep felt passion. Well done :) You should attempt poetry more often - it's pretty decent.

I've looked over your other two stories...and I'm planning to go read "The Ghost Writer". I've read the first chapter, and it's intriguing, and catchy.

I love poetry — though I can’t profess to be the biggest fan (I read too few poets)— but I enjoyed the second one.

These are pretty! You should give poetry more of a try.

Good job!