Reviews for Play Your Cards Right

Reviews For: Play Your Cards Right

Forfeit The Game 2008-07-29 ch 1,	abuseMaybe it would be better if you called it "Play Your Cards Wrong". Just a random thought. Anyways... Its a good way of showing how sometimes you can be reluctant to love, and then when you give into it, all it ends up doing is hurting you. Yet people continue to do it. I like it, I just think that maybe it might have been better if you'd added more metaphors to make it like a "card game".
doctor's diagnosis 2008-07-03 ch 1,	abuseReview game!! I like this becuase of the extended metaphor of a card game. It's reoccurance throughout the poem ties it all together. I this puntuation would help this poem a lot. Punctuation gives a poem definition. I don't like this "..." at the end, it seems a little out of place. The rest of your poem has no punctuation and then theres a random dot dot dot. I think the stanzas could be broken up differently to further emphasize the meaning of the poem. If you broke it up to be the lines 1 2 and 3, then 4 5 and 6, then 7 and 8 and 9 and 10, I think the poem would come across as stronger. Just some suggestions. :) Cheers, r.
Briar's Thorn 2008-06-06 ch 1,	abusekill him. he deserves it. anywho, i like it. loving is like play poker some times, or old maid. either you let people in and sometimes get hurt and lose, or you can never let anyone in and end up an old maid. nice. i like your choice of words, and the way this poem staggardly flows. nicely done
Sexy vampirechick 2008-06-06 ch 1,	abuseThough your poem is great,I think you can give it a little more descrpition for the reader to see the imagery.I didn't really like the "but" and the "and" at the beginning of some of the lines.I think it would've sounded better if you had removed them and use a semi-colon or a period.

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