Reviews for Death Waltz - FictionPress.com

Reviews For: Death Waltz

Distilledfx 2008-06-03 ch 19,	abuseAwesome - another chapter. I get excited when I see updates in my inbox... a bit sad really. Another great chapter, this has made me as confused as Nitara about the whole power right thing. Shadi has obviously been tricked by the Ling and now I wonder what is happening there. I did notice a few errors though... "Up a long flight of [stair] we went, " this should be "stairs" "[Turing] through a door I was sure wasn't mine I raised a brow, it seemed rather...small." This should be "Turning"? Nice work and keep updating, I have no idea where this is going or how long it has left.
Distilledfx 2008-05-28 ch 17,	abuseAnother great chapter. Everything makes more sense now, though I think the plan might have changed a little to the one Nitara proposed to Chase. This just keeps getting better
Distilledfx 2008-05-26 ch 16,	abuseMore great stuff, I'm only now realising how much you haven't revealed in your plot. The arrangement, the rest of the Power Right etc. I still have trouble finding errors in your writing and because you have kept so many details regarding back story, everything is unexpected. Not only Nitara's but also Raine's. Also I think that the pics on your profile is a good idea, I just don't know how I could find anything like that for my own characters. Keep it up I'm wondering if this story is near the end or only just beginning.
Niek 2008-05-20 ch 13,	abuseAmazing. Simply amazing. You're detailed plot and well thought out characters are astounding to no end. I look forward to your future chapters because this story is truly worth reading. Until Next Time, Niek
Distilledfx 2008-05-20 ch 13,	abuseI haven't read for a while but I caught up today. You have maintained your mastery of hooks, at the end of every well crafted chapter, I just had to read the next one. You have obviously spent a lot of time planning this, and you have also shown a greatness in revealing important plot details. Everything is so polished and you have come up with ways of doing things (subtitles, etc) that I haven't seen before and work really well. Shadi really is a smart, scheming leader, who isn't as good willed as I first thought. Nitara finally has a back story, which, as Julian said, was worth the wait. Everything in this is just the way it should be, I can't think of what else to say. I'll have a look at all your other stuff, but this is really a well written story. Nice stuff. If you want more reviews, you can head over to the review game, you review a story and then someone reviews part or all of yours. There are a lot of great writers of many different genres there who won't suck up as much as me, might actually give you some concrit. Keep writing! I want to know what happens next!
Distilledfx 2008-04-13 ch 4,	abuseWhile this story seems cliche in a few ways, I still really like it. Your writing is great and polished and the plot sits just right. As Nitara drew in Julian, she drew me in too, now I want to know why she doesn't have a problem with the killing. Part of life is learning to be tolerant of things you once weren't I guess. I wonder too what the story holds for Nitara, I'm pretty sure she wants to be powerful so she can become a master, or maybe there is some use for her that normal vampires can't fulfil. I'm into this now... I can't wait for more.
Distilledfx 2008-04-12 ch 2,	abuseAnother great installment. I like the politics in this (which is strange because I normally find them boring) and the mystery of the "Power Right" really makes me want to read on. It is clear (at this point anyway) that this is going to be a long, in depth story which is well planned already. I get the feeling the main character (I forget her name) will be the meeting challenger, but I could be wrong. It seemed a little weird that Shadi would be so opposed to Master Chase's equal human rights stuff and have her in his personal guard, but I'm sure there's a reason that will be explained later. The only error I picked up was: "In the after math our two clans will rightfully stand..." 'aftermath' is one word. Good story, I'm going to have to keep reading this
Distilledfx 2008-04-09 ch 1,	abuseI normally can't stand Vampire stories, but this really worked and kept me interested. Nice work. Your writing reads like you written a lot before and is great to read and the plot doesn't drag on. I think the part explaining Shadi's background should have been shorter maybe, but thats about it. Nice twist too. Some errors I noticed: "...a new Master in Shadi and turned him..." Should this be "turned on him"? "understood about vampirism, immortality is only" This should be a ";" Keep writing, it'll be interesting to see where this goes.

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