Reviews for Die - FictionPress.com

Reviews For: Die

.mate.feed.kill.repeat.
2008-04-14
ch 1,

abuseFirst.
There is more hope in your life than you give credit to. Look, when you get out of there, you're going to be so much better off. You can DEAL with problems. Look at the ** bright side. (Ah. I did NOT just say that.)

Second.
I'm not mad. I just sound mad. I really don't have anything to say. You can't die. You simply CAN'T. I need you, dammit. I'd say I don't care about what's happening to you at home, but that's the exact opposite of what I really mean. Whatever's happening, I wish I could get you out of there, but I can't. I really wish I could, but there's no way for me to do that.

Third.
This one was very good, rhythm and word-choice wise, but you need to either find someone to edit for you, or take a few extra minutes and look back for some basic mistakes. Apostrophes are very important. I must have read the first few lines a million times trying to figure out what "one friends" means... then I realized that you meant "one friend is."

You have plenty of hope. Just because Greg's an idiot and your mother is ...well... your mother... doesn't mean that you have to see life as a bottomless pit of despair and agony. Honestly Casi. You have everything to look forward to.

I love you.
Now stop being all suicidal like,
IT'S SIMPLY NOT ALLOWED. =]

Return to Top