Home Just In Communities Forums Beta Readers Dictionary Search Login Register Extras
Reviews For: So Alone

Ramenluver
2008-07-20
ch 1,
abuseReally liked this. ^ ^

I think this was my favorite line:

"Air hangs still
A ruse, until
My lungs will heave to silence."

I just really liked the imagery. :)

This was darker than I expected it to be, but beautiful in a morbid way, I think. Good job.

-Ramen
Twilight Starr
2008-07-03
ch 1,
abuseGreat job at describing feelings. Nice work. Keep writing!

Good luck with poetry and life. Have a lovely day and a wonderful summer.

~Twilight Starr~
Nat Nair
2008-04-19
ch 1,
abuseTwo cents: Good job on the rhythm, but the lack of variation makes it seem perhaps just a little bit monotonous after the first couple of paragraphs - although that could be an intentional effect, as it might serve to reinforce the negative mood...

Hm. In any case, keep on writing!
Return to Top