FictionPress.com - let the words flow
| FictionPress.com - let the words flow |
|
| Home Just In Communities Forums Beta Readers Dictionary Search | Login Register Extras |
| Kiwi-kiwi6 2008-05-07 ch 1,  | abuseInteresting poem. It painted a picture from the fireman's point of view. Good job. |
| East-0f-Eden 2008-04-27 ch 1, | abuseyou're vividly descriptive. it reminds me of the firemen I know. |
| Peanuts Factory 2008-04-25 ch 1, | abuseThe ending caught me off guard.:) It's true, but we all hope.. |
| Esther Jade 2008-04-23 ch 1, | abuseReview game! I liked the opening. I thought it had a lot of impact. I also liked the lines "fire burnt,...//...high". I thought you put in some nice rhythm at that point. I thought there could have been more structure to frame the development of the poem. It might be a good idea to put stanzas is. In the third to last line, I thought the "anyway" disrupted the rhythm in the line a bit. It just didn't sound quite right. |
| Glowing Aura 2008-04-21 ch 1, | abuseWow. That was sad, I think I got a little misty-eyed. I don't think I could ever take a job such as that. Not only am I a pryophobic, but I what I fear more...well, it's what this poem is all about. |
| starleaf 2008-04-19 ch 1, | abusewow, i really liked this. especially the last two lines. i can only imagine how hard it would be to not be able to save lives, especially when its your job.. :\ Really good job with this one. I honestly don't have anything I'd change about it. |
| Edensong 2008-04-19 ch 1, | abuseA little morbid and very sad. Nice use of description. Subtle but clever rhyming, I didn't notice the ABAB sequence until the second group. Keep writing! |
| fatbird33 2008-04-19 ch 1, | abusevery powerful. nice job |