[features too chiseled]
Interesting way to describe it. It reminds me of statues by Michaelangelo and such...nice image.

[martian hanging from my groin]
Hm, not as powerful of a description as your other one. I guess it seems more literal.

Nice work on both of these, though. Very interesting collection.

~Sparkles from the Review Marathon (link in profile)

I just realised there was a second part to your first poem (or the other way around, as this one was published first), and I think you capture what a transperson has to go through beautifully. I don't think anyone can really understand the pain and effort it takes to wake up every day in the wrong body, or to start the transition and be discriminated against everywhere. You definately have a way with words. Thank you.

The first line I didn't like as much as the rest. I just feel like chiseled isn't really the biggest deal if that makes sense. But I love the martian line.. that was a perfect descriptions and the last line was really powerful too.

I like the element of imprisonment in this one. It makes it so much more agonizing. Another great haiku.

marie

i think a haiku is too short a form to fully capture the frustration of being a gender you don't want to be. in that sense your haiku feels strangely incomplete, like there should be more to it.

somehow, the way you've written it seems too distant. again, i think this is because of the limited form. additionally, the second line seems a bit out of place, but perhaps it's just me: i feel 'martian' is inappropriate here. perhaps use another word? but then again it's a good way of showing how alien the girl feels, inside a man's body.

however, within the confines of a haiku structure, i think you've done a good job of capturing the feelings of the persona. i especially like how the third line wraps everything up and suggests that the female is only trapped inside the male, waiting to manifest.

beautiful, beautiful, beautiful.
(i have yet to read the other one.)

rowan.

I like the other better but this one is good too. You're doing something I can't do for I talk to much. I could never write a haiku or a limerick for that matter.

It's straight to the point and easy to understand. You've done a wonderful job with both.

I'll agree: I liked the other one more. I do like the metaphor with "martian hanging from my groin", though.

Good, I think I like the Female to Male one better though! Good Job. (I reviewed both of them!)