FictionPress.com - let the words flow
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| perpetual questions 2008-04-25 ch 1,  | abuseI like the honesty and directness here; you pull it off without sounding too bland or unopoetic. The free-verse rhythm flows well and the emotion is well conveyed. Nice work. -Adrian |
| Morgan Duriya 2008-04-21 ch 1, | abusewell done. I can sense the emotion behind the words. I love the first stanza: "I'd like to tell you I never write you love songs, But every night my pencil Becomes a little duller..." I love it! keep up the good work |
| kelsi bones 2008-04-20 ch 1, | abuse"I’d give up flirty glances To share all our favourite songs; I’d give up making you laugh To let you cry on my shoulder." those lines are amazingly beautiful, and i can relate to them so well. the only thing i would change in this is the last line. i think it would be better as: "But I know you’re not the kind of boy Who would fall for a girl like that (a girl like me)." just my opinion though. excellent work =] *favs* k.X |