FictionPress.com - let the words flow
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| Persica 2008-04-21 ch 1,  | abuseI'm hardly fluent yet, so I can't give a very detailed review, but this stuck out in particular: it's "desu," as opposed to "des" as you've spelled it. In many cases, spoken Japanese will omit the U from words containing "su," but they still need to be included in written Japanese. Also, if you're going to post this in the Japanese language section of FP, it would kind of be prudent to write it using kanji and kana. がんばれ～ (Haha, I really need to work on my own Japanese, too...) |