Reviews for Love Bites - FictionPress.com

Reviews For: Love Bites

nevermindira 2008-06-28 ch 2,	abuseWrite more! Werewolves are the best, and yeah... But I did find it a little coincidental that Logan is the cover name for Wolverine in the X-Men. Coincident? Or were you thinking of Wolverine when writing this or do you not know anything about X-Men? But yeah update.
The bunny always dies first 2008-06-23 ch 2,	abuse...and still no update
Faith Adeline 2008-05-21 ch 2,	abuseGood chapter. Couple of things: thoughts are in italics, you got to be careful about the lines, cause there was one in the middle of a sentence, and you want to be careful about punctuation and things like that. There are some awkward sentences and such also. I would consider getting a beta. Other than the techincal things, the content is good. Keep it up :) Faith
xbrunnettex0 2008-05-21 ch 2,	abusei really like this story. im glad he didnt hurt her. update soon!
Luna Turner 2008-05-21 ch 2,	abuseYou think you are terrible at writing? Ha, I don't think you know what terrible is. This writing is exceptionally good. And I mean EXCEPTIONALLY good. You had a few typos, nothing big. There could've been much more description, especially of Logan and Violet. I really wish the chapter had been longer. I really like it so far and cannot WAIT to read the rest. ~Luna Turner
Endowment's Seraph 2008-05-21 ch 2,	abuseI enjoyed this. listen, don't worry about how good a writer you think you are, I don't come to this site for stephan king quality, I come for the orriginality and the passion. I think that's what makes the story, the author's love to write. I can't wait to read more ~Mel
Far.abi 2008-05-21 ch 2,	abuseyou have really nice elements and what you have to do is slow things down a bit (not the story but the actions) and lots more detail. it's a bit of a skeleton now or a summary of actions. i know it's only the first chapter but you should try to differentiate the main character from turning into one of those mary sue characters. keep writing! you have an interesting story on your hands.
Endowment's Seraph 2008-04-30 ch 1,	abuseinteresting begining. I'm intrigued to read where this is going. ~Mel
Luna Turner 2008-04-26 ch 1,	abuseWOW. FINALLY! A new one! Yay! I love to read your writing. I can't wait to read this story when it develops. What a great start. I liked how you didn't use any names, and caused a mysterious and angsty atmosphere. Two ingredients to suspend your audience and have them begging for more. I wish it had been longer. My only criticism. I wished there had been more description about the group of strangers. And sometimes some of the words almost didn't fit. But I can't wait to read more! ~Luna Turner
bitter.ch0c0late 2008-04-26 ch 1,	abuseit's too early to say anything but I'm certainly curious so you have to update ^^
Faith Adeline 2008-04-25 ch 1,	abuseLovely beginning. I like it, has potential. Keep it up and update soon. Faith
Far.abi 2008-04-25 ch 1,	abuseinteresting so far.
cyanidecandy 2008-04-25 ch 1,	abuseah cliffie ! please update asap :D can't wait.
L.B. Dale 2008-04-25 ch 1,	abuseIt's still a little too early to give my opinion on this story yet, but I do have some pointers. Rather than saying "monk like people" in the first sentence, you can describe their attire to add the mysterious effect. I'm sure if you mention something along the lines of "mysteriously hooded males" or something of the sort, we'll all have the image of monks in our minds before reading any further. And if you can, describe the manner in which the monks chatted. Because of the short length of this prologue, it would be important to make the mood and atmosphere as alive as you can to keep the reader's attention. Other than that though, great job. This story seems to have a lot of potential, and I'm looking forward to the next chapter. :)
KelseyBell910 2008-04-25 ch 1,	abuseThis is a really good start. You should continue soon. =]

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