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| NekuraSunshine 2008-05-09 ch 1,  | abusewow that's so cool! haha. it made me laugh. I agree with the previous review, though ^_^ Good job, darling! |
| The.Wizard.Pen.Dragon 2008-05-08 ch 1, | abuseI liked the idea for the most part and your writing style is sound, but I thought that maybe taking the sort of "surprise" ending thing out of the summary might make it more of a surprise. Also, maybe if you expanded more on the moster and her encounter with it it would make it seem like the ending was less rushed seeing as you used a lot of desciption in the beginning. But other than that I don't know what else to say! ... It was pretty good, but I believe that with some more work (Who would think that a oneshot would take so much time?) it could be REALLY good! Write on! Pen.Dragon |