FictionPress.com - let the words flow
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| AK the Twilight 2008-05-09 ch 1,  | abuseIt wasn't entirely in iambic pentameter, if I'm not mistaken, but this was richly written. Your descriptions are real and your language is fully of vivid energy. The words were expansive and beautiful. Sonnets are tough to write, but you didn't forget a majority of the keys required to write a good one. This was excellent. However, I do need to insist that you title your story. Just writing a poem or song and leaving it untitled not only seems a bit lazy, but it doesn't condense the story into an easy-to-capture motive. I mean, the title is the first thing a reader will see, so you need to consider that when finishing up a poem. Other than that, this was a superb read. Keep up the great work! |