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| Silenced Soul And Alter Ego 2008-05-11 ch 2,  | abuseHey, I knew I should've expected the overprotective brother-like best friends to emerge somewhere. Mrs. Leuss sounds like a lovely woman, not to mention the fact that they're unbelievably lucky to have a favorite teacher in such a horrible class (I'm starting Chem in June and the weight of my book does not add to my enthusiasm). And I love this line: 'She said we were the stuff of books – the stereotype-breaking, fall-in-love-with-your-best-friend, kind of books.' Everyone loves these kinds of books (which reminds me, I've never read Twilight before... hm... gotta ask around to borrow). And I have yet to know a girl who didn't like 'em. And Byron's... well, very interesting. I can't wait for his POV chapter. Signing out, Silenced PS. Bella and Edward (Gaspard, not Robert) look so much better together. Argh... |
| SamanthaNicole 2008-05-11 ch 1, | abuseHmm. I have to say, you have a really interesting premise. I like the idea that the five of them really shouldn't be friends, but are, anyway. It's different than a lot of the other stories that are on here, and I like that. Different is always nice. I like a little spice. Maybe it's just me, but this kind of reminds me of the Breakfast Club. Which isn't a bad thing, because I love that movie. Chapter stories are hard to write, yes. You think you have a great idea, and you whip out a few chapters, and then you realize that you have no idea where to go anymore, and it eventually is abandoned. I've had a LOT of stories like that. But I think, with some work, you've definitely got something here. So stick with it! One thing: At the beginning, you repeat the first line twice, which really didn't make any sense. I'd probably delete one of them. Other than that, nice job, darling! Love, Sammy |
| Silenced Soul And Alter Ego 2008-05-10 ch 1, | abuseHey, I noticed that alot of your stories are one-shots, is this going to be one of them too? I hope not, because this is a very interesting intro. Five teens and their senior year. Who knows what'll happen? Oh, and you didn't scribble in Jackson's appearance. Signing out, Silenced PS. I can't wait for the Twilight movie. I really wanted Gaspard Ulliel for Edward but I guess I just have to accept Robert Pattinson. -sigh- |