FictionPress.com - let the words flow
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| Teffie 2008-05-24 ch 1,  | abuseWoah. That's a shocker of a start. There weren't any grammatical errors, but you repeated the first sentence twice. I think you could expand this chapter, playing up Kirai's confusion and shock, and maybe revealing a bit more of her personality. This story sounds interesting. I hope you update soon! |
| JoeyJinxstar 2008-05-11 ch 1, | abusehaha i love the snarky lady :3 what happens next!? i demand more~ |