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Reviews For: Ergo, she says to an empty room

in theory
2008-07-25
ch 1,
abuseOkay on the other account now, so confusing. I forgot to say I liked the "scar myself with forgiveness" line, it just popped up while I was trying to navigate through all the tabs I've opened.

Again, nice work.
interrobangdance
2008-07-25
ch 1,
abuseHehe I've missed your poetry! Your style has evolved a lot in the past what, four years? Blimey that seems ages! (I'm 20 now too. No longer have a reasonable excuse for angst :P) "The weight of hate" is so poignant, the rhyme makes the weight actually hit me harder, the first stanza feels so...heavy, for want of a better word. The last stanza I think everyone can relate to, it's so true. Writer's block is just a lack of anything really to say, not a way to say it. I suppose we can't have a meaningful point all of the time, but you can get around that with a nicely balanced mixture of satire and self-mutilation via words. Love it, as usual.




(btw I made a new account cus I had a flash of inspiration that I would start anew, but if you have loads of alerts saying I changed my pen-name about a million times just ignore it all heh. It's good to read you again)

Jack
Chandra-Moon
2008-06-11
ch 1,
abuseI have that same feeling. Ugh.
Professional scatterbrain
2008-06-09
ch 1,
abuseSimply stunning.
Frail.Wings.Of.Vanity.
2008-05-30
ch 1,
abuseI really like this poem. It touched me in a strange and demented way.
not that im saying your poems demented!
Its...hard to explain.
simpleplan13
2008-05-24
ch 1,
abuseI love the phrase "scar myself with forgiveness" because it's such a powerful image.

The similie in the second stanza is also really well done.

I love the last stanza the most though because it's kinda ironic since the beginning is a beautiful poem (at least in my opinion) and it's also really relatable for us poets.

PS If youre bored this weekend check out the Review Game's Review Marathon (link in my profile).
Thoughtful Silence
2008-05-18
ch 1,
abuseThe last stanza of this was just... perfect. Simple melancholy conveyed - ironically? - in a beautiful way. Anyways, great job!

-Thoughtful Silence
sleeping Pisces
2008-05-15
ch 1,
abuseAt the very least you can write interesting poems when you have little to say.

I like the honesty behind this. It's written in that Faithless Juliet way, which sort of leave the reader dumbstruck. The ending was perfect, it's like you're telling someone something that is just plainly obvious.

I read the review by Julius Gillian, and I have to agree with what he said. I feel the same strive for perfection, and if I don't feel it, I just walk away. I have self-diagnosed myself as a maladaptive perfectionist. This is a nice way of saying that I'm really lazy, but that my excuse for procrastinating is that I'm too over-consumed with success that I don't see the point in even trying if failure is an option.

When you have something to say again, I'll be listening.

Peace, Daze
Julius Gillian
2008-05-12
ch 1,
abuseho hum, so melancholic.

i heard that some writers force themselves to write something everyday in order to keep in synch with their talent, otherwise nothing will happen and before they know it, a month, two months will have passed and they won't have written two words since the time they stopped.

well, i'm going through a flop stage right now to give it a name. and its about writing poetry at my level, and why am i so vain that i need to write beautiful poems in order to publish them? i've become so conditioned to fictionpress that when i write, i throw whatever doesn't work (poetry cards you'd find at kmart, et cetera). i have this strenuous rule that what i make has to be perfect, or near my potential. that's my feeling coming from your last stanza.

so anyway, i'm opting for short stories for now because i've been doing nothing but poetry for forever and i thought it'd be nice to write some prose (for once). poetry haituses suck in general and mine can last half a year.

anywhoms, I have math class shortly. maybe if I reach a new low in boring myself to death i'll come up with something worth writing about.

cheers,

- julian
Ashelin
2008-05-12
ch 1,
abuseI am with you on that. I feel...lost from poetry. As if it's rejected me, or I've forgotten it. Who knows? The muse gives and takes away. Short, but it was nice to hear from you.
Moondog Dozier
2008-05-12
ch 1,
abuseRelatable. Honest. And visual. The stark sincerity shows through well in this. Whether it is a lack of vocality or being pen-dry, it's a sinking feeling to be without. This captures that well with both the length, and the specific word choice. Well done. MD:77.
EyesEmphatic
2008-05-11
ch 1,
abuseGreat ending :)
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