Reviews for Boy bites boy - FictionPress.com

Reviews For: Boy bites boy

Roman C Lee 2008-08-05 ch 5,	abuseOh, wow, hiatus? Damn. lol, please update soon! hopes new ideas involving JillianCory sexy scenes fill your mind for new chapters That was some shota scene there, lol, and that makes it eligable for my C2 because it was a incest thing. His father pisses me off! Where the fuck does he get off HITTING Jillian like that? What an ASS! Kill him please! Or . . . something! Just give the bastard what he deserves for fucking with Jillians body and mind! lol, I'm getting all worked up over this story; I must really love it. I wish for more JillianCory love; they should have had sex that night! lol, ok, yeah, I'm just a pervert, but they should have! Update soon! loves this story
Roman C Lee 2008-08-05 ch 4,	abuseA daddy-complex? Hm . . . I wonder what all this means! By daddy-complex do you mean that he likes his father a little TOO much, or that he somehow . . . just has unresolved preoblems in that area? So, maybe he just feels like his father is putting him up for show as a dog by making him the heir? Or something like that, lol. And what is this real problem that he speaks of!!? lol, hopfully, all will be reavealed in the near future. I want Jillian and Cory to end up together! But I don't know how that's going to happen sniff. And I am curious about the world they live it; do all the human know of the existance of vampires among them? And if so, then why does Jillian still go to school even if he doesn't have to keep up a facade? Or, if people don't know about vampires, why did that one chick accept Jillian as a vampire so easilly? And then she had all that information up her sleeve! lol, I have so many questions, it's baffling even for me to try to take in, and you would think I could look over my own questions without getting a headache, lol. There's just so many!
Roman C Lee 2008-08-05 ch 3,	abuseM . . . I'm confused now, about the whole situation, but everything'll probably be cleared up in the next chapter. So, Jillian made Sebastien? And he couldn't feed because vampires normally feed off chicks if they're a guy and he doesn't like chicks so that wouldn't work out? And Sebastien likes Jillian? Who does Jillian like? Hehe, we all know who Cory likes! Woo! Go for the dhampire buddy! WOOT!
Roman C Lee 2008-08-05 ch 2,	abuseWoo, Jillians a vampire; awesome! And Sebastien is one also? And Jillian bit Cory the night before, so now he's going to change into a vampire as well? Or not, lol. What a fun story! I'm glad I found it ^-^ And I'm happy you wrote it!
Roman C Lee 2008-08-04 ch 1,	abuseO, this is cool! And hot, lol. I wish I had more time on the computer so that I could finish reading it right now! But I will soon, so I wont cry over it. You did a great job with this chapter; KUDOS!
Chasmodai Blue 2008-05-17 ch 5,	abuse(Okay, so I followed the links in the under-reviewed people's forum at the promise of returned reviews. There. Honesty. I have zombies.) And I come bearing constructive criticism to prove I'm not just a review-seeking whore. Potential potential potential. You're a good writer and you make interesting characters, most of the issues you have are with the formatting. Some of the parts are confusing because there aren't any breaks. Maybe a couple of hyphens between scene changes or something? Just so we know when the characters in use change. Also, making paragraphs longer. The amount of dialogue can discourage a lot of people. Possibly descriptions of where people are, what they do when they talk, the setting. Maybe some insight into their minds? If it's not your style, that's cool too. Personally, I don't mind it. I think you write dialogue very well. Nice that the half-vampires get some recognition. And a name. Usually it's just 'half-vampire'. (Clearly I am too unmotivated to look up the spelling). My friend uses the name all the time. I wish you luck on your next chapters.
DRAGONFIRE04 2008-05-15 ch 5,	abusePLEASE UPDATE SOON. I like to see what happen next. I like the story.

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