Creepy prologue! This story caught my eye because I previously started one that I put on hold...The Seven Deadly Sisters. You should check it out. ;-)

-DV-

Yay more chapters! I have to admit, I have a soft spot for Gula... I think it's the spikes... I am loving the character development too, looking forward to upcoming chapters!

Oh-oh-ooh! And it just continues to impress me.

Very well done.

- Koki

Wow. I really like this so far -- especially how you use the Latin names of the Cardinal Sins. While this concept at its most basic has been done before, I'm pleased to see that you've added a new spin to it that I find intriguing. I'm looking forward to the next chapter.

Keep up the good work.

- Koki

Yay! More delicious chapters! Please update soon, I'm dying to know where this story goes...

straight from the review marathon! (link in profile)

and we see acedia again. :)

hahaha... "How does he pee?" - loved that line. :D

this chapter was (probably intentionally) boring. :) so i think it was rather fitting. it wasn't the bad kind of boring.

i felt that you could have shortened the time that she was watching him... a week seems rather long and unbelievable (or maybe that was what you were going for). maybe if you shortened it, you could have expanded on what she was doing/thinking/feeling as she watched him.

anyway, good job so far! keep writing! :)

-Lefty

interesting - you didn't start with the temptation this time... you started with the chosen. :)

hahaha, green with envy? XD

i was hoping we'd see a bit more of how he's opposite of envy... like the others. oh well.

i'm still waiting to find out what exactly is going on... hopefully you'll push the plot sometime soon so that you don't keep me in the dark. XD

-Lefty

great job depicting this temptation - i think he may be my favorite. he's so funny! :D

i was surprised that the chosen for wrath was a woman - i thought it would be a man... maybe a husband who abuses his wife. *shrug*

"wall of the building they were walked past" - i think it should be "they were walking past." if that's not what you meant... then i think it just needs to be reworded... ^_^;;

-Lefty

hahaha, avarice. great name. :) very fitting.

"Through out" - should be throughout.

i wish you could have added a bit showing how his personality is opposite of greed, too. :) it would have made a nice addition to the other chapters. but otherwise, it's great.

haha, what a stereotypical snobby/glitzy woman. XD i really liked your description of her... very ornate and elaborate. XD

-Lefty

this one didn't work quite as well, though i see how you tried to make her dislike sex. it wasn't as blatantly obvious as the others, but it wasn't bad. :) still, i'm not sure how you could make it more effective... but... maybe you could add something in her personality that is more obviously anti-lust.

i wonder why she chose a "manwhore" instead of a prostitute?

i wonder what her proposition was... O.o i'm still waiting for all to be revealed! XD

-Lefty

so, there are male temptations! :)

i love your description of him... he's the exact opposite of gluttony. :) so good job with that.

i kind of wish i knew what was going on... what do the temptations do to their chosens and what is the hunt? you definitely keep it vague, but i hope you won't keep us in the dark too long. XD

-Lefty

ah, i see... we are introduced to another of the temptations. and she's a girl. :)

"ragged-wrapped hands" - does this mean that her hands are ragged and wrapped? or is it that they're wrapped in rags? or wrapped in ragged rags? XD this was just a little confusing.

hmm... i wonder what she's going to do to him. i like how the temptations are the exact opposite of what they represent... vanity is messy and not vain, i assume. :)

-Lefty

straight from the review marathon! (link on profile)

interesting concept. :) when i first read your title, i thought you were talking about the band. XD

i like your description of acedia... you made her very vivid. i also like how she's not sloth-like... :)

i wish, though, that you had given us more about the other temptations. are they male or female? their names? i'm sure you'll give it to us in future chapters, but as this is the prologue, i was hoping for those introductions here.

onto the next!

-Lefty

Oh lordy, this is such a cool story... where did you get the idea? I love how the Sins aren't obvious in appearance, almost opposite in fact. Genius story, please update!