Interesting. I like the bold words against the normal text. It's a writing style I use a lot too. Love how you do it though. The parallel past and present plots running alongside each other. I normally use the words in bold to signify a split personality or a strange inner voice or something talking to the protagonist. I think the teacher failed you because she was too disturbed and concerned for your mental health. I'll send you the link for my nearly-failed essay as soon as I finish editing it and tying up the loose ends.

An essay for an English Composition class...wow.. Well, I can't say much, I tried writing a more "standard-oriented" version of one of my earlier stories for my 7th grade English class... Think I got at least a B out of it... Haha!

Anyways, nice to see another male writer, (as I previously said in my reply to your review) and no, it's not strange that you write T and M stories for being sixteen. I've read countless fictions that have subject matter that I can't believe came from a teenager like me... or can't believe they post it...

Still, a well written one-shot overall.

Hey hey!

I read this a couple days ago but am only reviewing now. Yes, I'm a bad reader. =( =D

Okay first up, why the hell were you penalised for writing this? There's nothing wrong with it. I mean I took Advanced Lit. as a subject in high school and the teacher wouldn't have cared if I had written something like this so long as it fulfilled the requirements he had set.

Second, naw the rating's fine. M would be when you say exactly what they're doing whilst they're having sex, which you're not.

Thirdly and lastly, my my, this was an interesting fic. I enjoyed it big time. ^_^ I like how you've based this fic on something that people in real life face- the pursuit of happiness (no, not the movie).

Well done!

As to how I found you, well, I'm glad you joined the SKOW yahoo group otherwise I don't think I would've found you. You're writing is really good. =D Which is why I subscribed to you.

Keep up the good work, and I think I'll go check out your other stuff!

gulistanlik

It would be like, so cool if you didn't bold all those letters, seriously. Other than that, me like ^^ And for a 16 year old, writing M or T rated stories. It's nice to see from a guys perspective cos most (think 99%) of the writers here are all girls. I'm your neighbor, as in, I live in Malaysia. (Please, don't go asking around who dancing.keys is. Haha). I'm already writing the T rated stuff and I'm um... twelve? Yeah, somewhere around there. Overall, this story was great ^^
Cheers,
d.k

lol, u write this kinda stuff for ur english compo, obviously u'd fail!! you got to write what the teachers like, not what u like!

I think the rating is fine considering you don't actually say they're having sex. and it's pretty cool to see a suicidal kid turn to realizing why he lives. :)