Not again! *pounds head with fist* Okay, going to HIT SEND this time. Sorry, Kaida.

I can't remember exactly what I said, but I do know that I like the interaction between Kirin and Sasuke, Nathan and Kirin. It's good to be reminded these are just /kids/! And I might've been reading too much into it, but the fact Nathan was playing with his ID tag might've reflected his thoughts on his /identity/... and I'm /rambling/...

In chapter 12, Tsube's voice is just funny. "I couldn’t help finding a huge cat with a confused expression funny. Thank for my inappropriate sense of humour." That's the best kind of humor! Neko has a temper, and I'm glad to see it's getting him into trouble. I'm also glad he doesn't trust Dr. Hiko, because I don't particularily trust what he says either. And Neko's parting words are epic. Neko, 1. Hiko, 0.

I might've had some constructive critisism, but alas, I can't remember it. A thousand more sorrysorrysorries, and I'll be waiting for the next installment!

Daw, thanks for the mention! I'm very glad your Nan's feeling well. ^^ And a sleepy review:

Yes, I /definitely/ like Rico. And Neko's starting to look pretty awesome too, especially since Tsube described him as someone who'd rather run than fight. Guess he proved her and me wrong! I wonder if any more of Kirin's gang turn out to have her powers...? Um, the only thing I can think of to better this scene is to draw out Rico's transformation. I've got no idea how to do that though, so it might be best left alone. Shrug.

In other news, the last three paragraphs made me laugh! "Oh, no idea! Handy though!"

I'm glad Kirin's awake (and still fiesty!). I'm wondering if the Tarin Children, now that they've got Sophie back, will help her escape, try to stop her, or stay locked in an internal battle! I like internal battles. It's fun to watch the physical manifestations.

Huge, drawn out critique on one little thing: I though there should have been a little more turmoil in this scene. After all, this girl has just popped out of nowhere and claimed to be their long-lost friend. They could be sceptical or overjoyed or be weeping and asking why she left them, they wouldn't just gasp and hug her and get on with it. Er, unless the scientist's expirements on them have desensitised them, or they were too young to remember her, or people in the future just don't care that much. You know. Something like that.

"Jeez, Kirin, I know you’re in pain but do you have to share it?" I laughed at that. :)

I'll check back in a few weeks to see the next chapter. I might get ansy and check Freewebs, though! Good luck.

I read real fast This oone needs to be about 80 chapters it is fun to read so far

Yes! They're not seperated anymore! I'm not quite so happy to see Kirin hurt, but it sure makes her more lovable. So was it the name change that made the guards react so violently, or was it something she told them later? In any case, I'm starting to realize just how important Kirin is to the others. And Nate is... interesting. I imagine him as a young wolvereine.

I'm probably going to have to peek at Freewebs again, just to see the Children's reactions to "Sophie's" return! Thanks for the chapter, and good luck with regular updates.

Eek, short review again:

I'm glad we get a little exposition on Kirin's powers. That is very interesting that the parents weren't affected, but it is scientifically accurate (I think). I wonder what the voice from the walls is proposing... Hopefully it isn't too terrible, since I don't see what else Kirin can do. Last, I feel stupid for asking but... what soppy reunion with Hiko is she referring to? I'll look through again.

Good chapter as always, and I hope you don't leave us in suspense for too long!

I think some more character development would have been good before this chapter. Just because we don't know most of the characters well enough to relate or be afraid for them.

On the good side the dialog here is good, they seem a bit too relaxed but its pretty natural and all around a good chapter considering it on it's own.

-Lorki

"Lucky this wasn’t too often or I would be aching all over." Doesn't explain really what he's talking about. I ma be better to include something like- 'Luckily -I didn't have this job- often, or I would be...'

Again I like your descriptions but their so bunched out, breaking the large bunches of sentences down into paragraphs would really help this chapter as well.

-Lorki

"I'm still not woken up properly yet," that sentance seemed a little odd to me, its seems like 'not' should be 'Haven't'

Also you change tenses sometimes, like going from past tense to present tense. It'll be easy to catch if you proofread closely.
Besides that a nice introduction to the characters, I love the names.
-Lorki

Alright, well first off nice detail! I think it could use a few line breaks, I mean thats really long for just one paragraph. Also if you take a look at it you'll see this line break that is not suppose to be there " The bounty-hunters were looking for a

monster, not a 5-year-old girl!"

Its a solid start, and I like the bit at the end it sort of makes the reader want to continue!

-Lorki (From the Review marathon! -Linky on my profile :D)

Ah, so Rico has been alone and secluded? I wonder if Kirin can befriend him, and escape with him and the rest of her friends, or if he'll want to leave at all. Telling a stranger of her plans to escape is a risky move...

But wait, /wait/! This in an Institute filled with genetic scientists, but not one of them is a doctor? Granted, it's a great way to let the others know where Sasuke went and introduce the Children, but there has to be a plausible reason for an enemy streetrat being the first one they go to for medical advice. (This reason is probably going to pop up soon enough, but I'm looking for something to nit-pick about.)

So, there's my critique! I'm sorry I can't help you improve on much, but I've done all I can for the moment. I'm very curious about this world you're building, and I can't wait to learn some more about it!

Much shorter review this time:

Ooh, the plot thickens! Are these the mysterious "Children of Tarin"? Rico is definitely interesting, and I can't help but wonder why he's in a separate room. Maybe he's dangerous, or not up to par compared with those other children, or even a failed experiment? I'm glad Sasuke isn't dead, but I'm worried about how that "Nathan" boy will treat him. In any case, I'm looking forward to the next installment!

You’re looking for critique? I’m the master of tedious and detailed reviews! If I totally misinterpreted your note, then… oops! My bad! Just read this paragraph and disregard the rest. I must read more of your awesome story!! Please, post the next chapter when you can!

The prologue’s description was a sharp contrast to Kirin’s more casual narration. I’m not sure if I like them combined like that, but the prologue is short and non-invasive enough for me to get on with the story. I like flowery third-person prose and casual first-person prose, but I’d rather read what happens next as opposed to pondering, “How do they sound one after the other?” Take that as a compliment or a critique, whichever makes most sense.

Also, I was kind of confused about the chronology. Was the prologue’s italic section a dream, a flashback, or a flash forward? It confuses me to think that a not starving and happy girl (who had been free for a brief enough time to have never felt the rain) extended a hand of friendship to a little boy, then by the next rain was hungry and running for her life. From my perspective, it makes more sense for it to be a flash forward, but I’m not sure which it is. So… yeah.

The image of an vacuum cleaner accidentally exploding made me smile, and so did the fact that Kirin mistook an alarm clock for a bomb. (They /do/ look similar…)

Wow! Chapters three and four were intense. I’d like to see more description of the soldier’s reactions (or lack thereof) to being attacked by an army of little kids and a dragon. And oh no, I’m trying to think of ways she could get the others and herself out of this mess, but I have nothing. Especially since I don’t know where she is, and neither does she. Here’s hoping that Sasuke’s okay.

That cliffhanger is a great source of suspense… Please load the next chapters soon!