I really like it.

Thank you for treating my eyes to your work.

I really like it ... very good. It has a nice rhythm, so that even reading it out loud, you can hear it as a song.

-LoL

I like how you have the chorus in bold; it really makes it stand out. The only thing that I really noticed was that you lack a bit of punctuation. While you may have done this deliberately, it does obscure the meaning a little, so I would suggest adding some periods in where appropriate. Overall, though, pretty good lyrics and I like the premise.

- Kylie from the Review Marathon (link in my profile)