|
|
| Home Just In Communities Forums Beta Readers Dictionary Search | Login Register Extras |
| Militant Poet 2008-07-14 ch 1, | abuseYou have a beautiful natural touch, and your poetry speaks to me. Thank you for this poem, it was beautiful and I really enjoyed it. |
| Lady Fingers 2008-06-29 ch 1, | abusesmells like love |
| Confused Patterns 2008-06-29 ch 1, | abuseOh, lovely imagery! The ending was surprising, but very nice. |
| Alphabetical Dreams 2008-06-22 ch 1, | abuseThat's so beautiful! I especially love the fifth stanza; such great imagery!! It's a truly wonderful peice... good work. Live, laugh, love. Creating a Dream |
| sleeping Pisces 2008-06-18 ch 1, | abuseI really enjoyed reading this, the comparison between the person and the season flows really well. The use of autumn colours was done well, the whole poem conjured up the vivid imagery of a couple in a park, surrounded by falling red and yellow foliage. Very beautiful scenery. As I said, I enjoyed reading this but I've always found the line-gap-line layout of poems...I can't think of the word, but I think this poem would read better if it were broken up into stanzas. Other than that, I like. Well done. Peace, Daze |
| Midnight In Eden 2008-06-15 ch 1, | abuseStanzas! Structure! This piece is craving them. I know FP is a little tricky but there is a way to get stanzas and get rid of all the little irritating line breaks. To do this go to quick/edit window after uploading your document. Then, working from the bottom, backspace then SHIFT+Enter each individual space. Keep playing around with it til it works. Two other suggestions: 1. Be careful of your punctuation. Both of your semi-colons are unnecessary - the first should be a colon and the second one, no punctuation is necessary. 2. Why not name the shades instead of simply the colors? I've always found that adds another level to various images. Overall, I really enjoyed the language and imagery of this piece. It's a great metaphor and you carry it through with great cohesion. Finally, check out the Review Marathon, it's part of the Review Game - there's a link in my profile. Great way to give and receive reviews. Midnight |
| stained blue 2008-06-12 ch 1, | abusei love how natury it seems, like sitting outside in the forest, and i don't know why but this poem makes me think of alabama even though i don't live there, huh. |
| Thoughtful Silence 2008-06-09 ch 1, | abuseWhoa, this was... great! I loved the abundance of unique and vivid imagery in this, and many of the ideas - though a bit clichéd - left a smile on my face. Anyways, good job on this. -T.S. |
| fallenflame13 2008-06-08 ch 1, | abuseWow, this is absolutely beautiful. I love all the feeling you put into this. The last four lines were so sad! Good job. |
| Fan Fan 2008-06-07 ch 1, | abuseGood godess...you got a way with descriptive words :) I had to smile my way through reading this poem |
| ScarletDreamer 2008-06-02 ch 1, | abuseBeautiful. Absolutely gorgeous! I love your imagery. |
| Georgie The Wonder Llama 2008-05-31 ch 1, | abusewow this is so beautiful. The way you paint a picture with your words is outstanding. keep writing! |
| Isca 2008-05-31 ch 1, | abuseI'm going to be completely honest with you. That was one of the BEST poems I have ever read. I would pick a favourite line for you, but I really can't; there's too many to choose from! *Bows* I'm poetically humbled by this piece. I think I'll go read it again. :) |
| kloun doll 2008-05-30 ch 1, | abuseI like the mixing autumn and love, nice poem. |