Your a really good writer.

I like how this story switches between the two characters but I want to know more concrete details about the relationship.

Part (i):
-"The End" is confusing to me...at first, I thought the story was being told backwards...I was midway through before I realized "The End" was just a subtitle.

-Why was she shocked? (I don't think you need the comma.)

Part (ii):
-What are these scars?

-Has she hit him before?

-The word choice in this section really bothers me (mask, scars, piercing...) but that's completely personal. However, his reasoning is so vague that I think it either needs to be made more clear or left out entirely. I do like how the section is sandwiched between him closing and opening his eyes though.

Part (i):
-Switch in tense: "...the pain that [was?] swelling behind..." and "...he probably [didn't?] want to see her."

-I really like some of the phrasing in this section. "She knew his dream. And she wasn't part of the picture." What was his dream though? The "souvenir for her memories" is a unique phrase too...but souvenir makes me think of something bought and sold, not given or earned.

-I was once told that stories about strong emotions shouldn't contain crying or screaming. The value of that suggestion is up to you, of course, but I think the meaning behind the advice is that we should try to show the emotions of our characters through non-traditional routes. What other ways could the girl express her frustration with the situation besides crying?

Part (iv)
-Maybe the subtitle could be "The Beginning"? I'm confused about why you chose the same subtitle for the first and last sections.

-What is the world waiting for? This last line hints that the end of their relationship affects not only them, but a larger group of people. How?

I really like the poetry-esque quality of this story. You use your short sentences very well. They have a nice, jarring quality to them.