That's beautifully depressing. My suggestion would be to drop the lyrics, because all they end up doing is breaking up the wonderful prose, and it takes away from the emotion there. Just... wow. I think that's the only word to describe it... wow.

damn you for writing this.

seriously. it made me cry a little, on the inside.

well-written!

(and that song is amazing.)

Wow... that was... amazing. I could feel so much emotion in it. Great job. :)